As some of my former Dolce Vita followers witnessed, living
in India opened me in a wonderfully wordy way- I had so much to say there, and
a lot of time to say it. Choosing to begin my weekdays at 5:30 and then again at
the same time in the afternoon, all I basically did was practice yoga, drink
oceans of chai, eat a mountain of samosas, teach grade 1 (wow they were cute),
teach a social skills program (gee whiz I learned a lot), and blog. Blog about observing a place ablaze with colour
and odor... in love with malas and saris, dupattas, and the clang
clang jingle jangle of bejeweled wrists… sigh… head bob.
But now, I am in Nigeria, and I have nothing to say. Well
no, I have tons to say. Yet. Yet I can’t harness the passion to share with
others how I feel about working here. Gripped with guilt about not really
jiving with my second West African experience; riddled with insecurities of
sounding unoriginal; racist; and worst of all- cold hearted and unfair. Working
in Nigeria has awakened a dormant self I am grateful to meet face-to-face, with
all her trepidation and ugly truth. I met a side of me that comes to terms with
LIFE. Life can suck. People can suck and can be content doing the minimum, all
the while chortling to themselves and their neighbour, feeling mighty superior
in giving their very least and getting away with it. And with this dawning came
a clawing, hungry desire to better myself; raise my standards; give my 100%
and, actually Do Everything With Love. (Oh- and to find true balance by
mastering the blasted HANDSTAND!) I have upped my game. Being satisfied with my
less than perfect work self is gone. (I am not a perfectionist, I actually
believe perfectionism is a waste of time. Yet you can strive to DO your best
WITHOUT agonizing over every detail or turn perfectionism into procrastination…
but I digress) Now a striving, strong, and ever smiling B lives in my heart and
head; knowing that a life well lived is a life where you go to bed properly
knackered, sandwiched between your loving partner and a soft scruffy scrappy
pup pup with the faith that you DID. YOUR. BEST.
With my Nigerian time coming to a close, my stomach grumbles
with appetite to write.